Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Kids say the darndest things...

My nieces were here for Thanksgiving.

They always amuse me.

I was alone in the car with them coming back from the park, when I smelled a smell that is best described as, shall we say, "fart-like".

So I asked: "Did one of you guys fart?"

Niece #1 (7 years old): I didn't.
Niece #2 (5 years old): No, you did (to her sister). Because I never toot and lie.

Oh, from the mouths of babes. I about nearly died.

I recounted the story later to my boyfriend who was back at the house, and he told Niece #2 that she had a very good policy, and that he too never farted and lied, and it was good to be proud of one's farts. She was proud as punch. That made me laugh even more.

The next day we were in the car with Niece #2, who had fenagled it to go to the restaurant in our car, while her sister went with the grandparents and parents. So I was saying something to my boyfriend and used the word "stupid". Now over the course of the week I had learned that there are a lot of words that my nieces aren't allowed to use at school. You won't believe this, but "darn" is one of them. And "stupid" too. It's funny, because the nieces will go: ooooh, she said the "s" word...the one that rhymes with "ooopid". then I had about had enough of their school's stooopid policy of forbidding all these words.

So I said, "okay...well, next time you are really angry with someone at school, and you want to call them stupid, but can't. Call them a communist. No, even better, a fascist. Wait, no a Democrat."

Niece #2 was gleeful: new words....bad words...bad words she could use.

So she asked: "Can I call them a Democrat-face?"

"Uh, huh" I replied.

"What about a poopy Democrat?"

"Oooh, even better."

My boyfriend just shook his head and said I was being very naughty. I started to feel a tiny bit shameful about it, but still found myself to be very clever.

We got to the restaurant, and Niece #2 blurted out: "Auntie taught me some new words in the car."

Me: *deer in headlights look*

Luckily Niece #2 is very forgetful, and I pretended to be engrossed in convo with my bf, so the topic blew over...phew. Otherwise I might have been in some hotwater with my sis-in-law.


Blogger KBG said...

Aunts are totally for teaching bad words to nieces/nephews. My sister inadvertantly taught my son his first dirty word. Unfortunately it was a "real" one that slipped out in front of him when she realized he had spilled chocolate milk on her couch. My only hope is that one day he will use Democrat as a dirty word as well.

3:56 PM  
Blogger Teresa said...

You do realize you'll probably get her expelled for that. *grin*

7:06 PM  

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