Never been better!
A friend of mine said to me today, only 11 more weeks!
And it struck me: when my boyfriend first left, I used to count the weeks, and check them off. Every Tuesday, was a further week. But after about Week 9 or 10, I stopped doing it. At that point, I had “gotten used to it.” And now 40 weeks later, I have gotten beyond used to it. This is just plain normal now. Him being gone.
Like I already mentioned, the deployment is now longer than our relationship was before he left. So, even though right now sucks, I can honestly say, our relationship has never been better. I mean, yes, we have communication problems, in fact, I could start an alternative blog called “Issues I have had with my Boyfriend because of Deployment.” Yes, I miss him terribly and wish he were back.
But still, we are so much closer than when he left. The leaps and bounds we have made in our relationship, in closeness, in trust, and in understanding this year, far surpass the foundation we had built in the eight months of dating before he left.
The eight months where the deployment loomed before us, the eight months where we enjoyed each other's company, but were both sufficiently intimidated by the future separation that we preferred to just enjoy the moment, the little time we still had together.
But at some point during the deployment, there was a tipping point, when we both realized that we were going to make it through to the other end together. That I would be standing there at the homecoming ceremony, and his wouldn't be another story of a Dear John letter. (Not that I didn't have my moments where I was worried I might get a Dear Jane letter...crazy, I know, but the mind plays crazy tricks on you sometimes).
And since then, it's almost been like a snowball, gathering momentum, and getting bigger and bigger the further it rolls. So, where for other couples this year may present a year of absence in a longer relationship, for us this represents the core of the relationship, and by default, the best it has ever been.
Which is just really ironic. So I think I might start counting weeks again, the countdown to "Even Better than This."
And it struck me: when my boyfriend first left, I used to count the weeks, and check them off. Every Tuesday, was a further week. But after about Week 9 or 10, I stopped doing it. At that point, I had “gotten used to it.” And now 40 weeks later, I have gotten beyond used to it. This is just plain normal now. Him being gone.
Like I already mentioned, the deployment is now longer than our relationship was before he left. So, even though right now sucks, I can honestly say, our relationship has never been better. I mean, yes, we have communication problems, in fact, I could start an alternative blog called “Issues I have had with my Boyfriend because of Deployment.” Yes, I miss him terribly and wish he were back.
But still, we are so much closer than when he left. The leaps and bounds we have made in our relationship, in closeness, in trust, and in understanding this year, far surpass the foundation we had built in the eight months of dating before he left.
The eight months where the deployment loomed before us, the eight months where we enjoyed each other's company, but were both sufficiently intimidated by the future separation that we preferred to just enjoy the moment, the little time we still had together.
But at some point during the deployment, there was a tipping point, when we both realized that we were going to make it through to the other end together. That I would be standing there at the homecoming ceremony, and his wouldn't be another story of a Dear John letter. (Not that I didn't have my moments where I was worried I might get a Dear Jane letter...crazy, I know, but the mind plays crazy tricks on you sometimes).
And since then, it's almost been like a snowball, gathering momentum, and getting bigger and bigger the further it rolls. So, where for other couples this year may present a year of absence in a longer relationship, for us this represents the core of the relationship, and by default, the best it has ever been.
Which is just really ironic. So I think I might start counting weeks again, the countdown to "Even Better than This."
posted by CaliValleyGirl at 11:46 PM
1 Comments:
They'll fly by! :)
Post a Comment
<< Home