Snow

It was snowing when he left last year. Well, it had been snowing. At the time, I found the snow gloomy and depressing. It is darker when it snows. Also, it is incredibly quiet. It muffles all noise. It was also pretty quiet around my boyfriend's apartment. We were both optimistic about our upcoming separation, but the silence spoke volumes. In it were our unspoken worries about the upcoming deployment.

We would cuddle and say how much we were going to miss each other, but I think we both knew the very real possibility existed that we wouldn't be together in his apartment again. Not just because of the life threatening dangers of a deployment, but also because of the strains it puts on a relationship, especially a burgeoning relationship.

And the snow was everywhere. And it made everything seem colder.

After he left, I couldn't wait for spring to come, for winter to be over. Time just couldn't move along fast enough. Finally the snow melted and gave way to spring.

As happy as I was to see the grass shoots appear last spring, I was even happier to see the snow again this year. It means we have nearly come full-circle. He will soon be home again!

And now I find the snow beautiful. It blankets the whole countryside. When I was jogging this afternoon I had to squint, and cursed myself for not wearing my sunglasses, because it was so bright, the sunlight being reflected off thousands of tiny snow crystals. It was almost metaphorical: the future is so bright now!